Put Down the Peanut Butter!!

Finally April is tomorrow. Hurry up April has become a theme between my friend Marissa and me. Why you ask, because since the year has started it has been non-stop craziness. Projects and deadlines at work seemed never ending. Usually I don't mind, but when one starts before another one or two ends it does become a bit much. However, I was trusted with some really important and wonderful jobs, for that I am thankful. I was given a chance to learn and grow and see what I am made of. I made some big belly flops along the way but I never gave up. I received the most incredible amount of support from my boss. When I doubted myself, he never did, and always encouraged me to keep trying. This week closed out one of the bigger projects. This was almost 6 months in the making, but really picked up speed back in January. As of today I can officially say that project is closed and was a huge success!!

I was given a mission and with a team of other amazing people we made it happen!

Now on the home front...I miss my couch. I have been working late and trying to catch up with friends that I am feeling a little sleepy these days. I did manage to keep up with my 5 am 21 Day Fix workouts!  I feel like that really helps jump start my day.  BUT I must confess, I haven't been 100% with my eating. More like 80%. I've noticed by the end of the week I am tired and reach for the bad foods, for me, bad eating involves a jar of peanut butter and a spoon. GUILTY! Actually right before I wrote this I was sitting on the couch with a jar of peanut butter and a spoon. The good news is I didn't finish the jar, the bad news is I ate half before I went WTF are you doing!! The peanut butter jar is now safely behind pantry doors. I am back in touch with myself and confessing my food sins to all of you.

I was tired, so tired and victory of the week,
and the peanut butter called me from the pantry!

I workout every day, do I qualify for this...

Sometimes it amazes me how strong I am at work and never give up, but when it comes to eating better and being consistent all it takes is a sleepy night and a jar of peanut butter to get me off my track. I'm pretty sure I consumed 1200 calories alone with the peanut butter tonight, that's a lot of workouts to burn it off...sigh...back to the drawing board.

Well this seems fitting for tonight...good reminder.
I still feel bad, but tomorrow is a new day!

A Way of Healthy Life

Last month was absolutely crazy!  I got sick with an upper respiratory infection and a sinus infection, knocked me on my butt for at least a week. I admit, while in bed I didn't really eat more than Cheerios. Yup, you heard me correct I ate cheerios. I know my paleo, no grains, gluten-free readers are in shock and disbelief right now, but as I mentioned in my last post, I reached a point where what I had been doing wasn't working and I was miserable. Time for a change.

After a year with no results and being unhappy
I knew it was time to take action for my future

I was searching for a way of eating that would allow me to eat a more balanced way of life. Something that would hold me accountable for how much I eat. Something that would allow me to have the occasional indulgence. Most importantly, I wanted something I could do forever. I know there will never come a time I don't have to watch how much or what I eat, but maybe there is a way to have it all and enjoy it and be healthy and lose weight.

I admit I am guilty of this when I deprive myself

That way of thinking lead me back to my original weight loss time, years ago... Weight Watchers!! I did some googling and found that the program changed since I did it last and now the points weren't just about calories, but also took into consideration protein, fiber, and fat and the roles they play. I was still debating to spend the money or not and saw they were running a promotion, no registration fee and a neat little starter package if I signed up for 3 months. I decided with my time being all over the place I would sign up for online only to make it work with my life. I was feeling truly excited for the first time in a LONG time!

This is what my food selection for today looks like.
So may delicious foods I can eat and enjoy
And I still have 5 points left for dessert later if I want

That was a little over a week ago, so how was the first week you are wondering... AMAZING! The phone app has made it so easy to track and check food points. Grocery shopping became more like a game, I walked around the aisles with the app and scanned bar codes to see how many points the food item was. The last week I have enjoyed, Morningstar Farms Chik patties, Sara Lee bread, Fiber One bars for dessert, and ground chicken in my delicious salads.

This was delicious! Eggo, chicken sausage, and egg whites

So easy to make delicious and filling foods

I had my first weigh-in this past Wednesday. I didn't think I lost anything with the yummy food I was eating, lack of exercise, and stressful weekend (more to come on that), but I did indeed have a loss of .6.  I know it doesn't seem like much, but for someone who hasn't seen a loss in a long time and just spent the week enjoying food and not stressing, that loss was very exciting for me.

I will keep you updated of my Weight Watchers fun and promise to post all my yummy food finds.

This is a way of life, not a temporary diet!! 

I Can If I Want

My last post "My Relationship with Food" was about my freedom from food. My plan is to stop eliminating almost all food groups and to start incorporating foods back into my eating habits that I haven't eaten in YEARS to see how my body reacts.

No more diets, just me eating healthy food choices 
and enjoying occasional treats without guilt
http://freedombeautyhappiness.com/222/

Since it has only been a few days since my mind shift and eating habits happened I know it will take longer to really see how things are progressing for me, but a lot has already changed and I wanted to update everyone.  After that blog post, I gave myself permission to eat. To live my life and enjoy. To not stress over every single food option. To not panic at the thought of eating out. To not freak out if I ate too much. To not listen to everyone else tell me what I should or should not be eating. I went to bed that night with those last thoughts. I woke up Saturday morning and the only word I could use to describe my feeling in that moment is FREEDOM. I was free; from myself, judgment, criticism, fear of failure, stress of eating, and the feeling of lacking.

For a brief moment this is exactly how I felt,
but then I remembered it's not just weight loss, but my health

I also decided that to keep myself still in check a little, I would start tracking again on myfitnesspal. So I made my goal any where between 1200-1300 calories and I added carbs back into my calculations. I had a delicious breakfast and then went off shopping. I felt giddy almost at this fresh start. Later that day at my parent's house I enjoyed some yummy food...nope I didn't everything in site but I did enjoy every piece that went into my mouth and enjoyed having energy to run around outside and play with my nieces, it was finally a nice spring day outside.

I had energy!
First time in a long time I wasn't being Aunt Cin, the lump on the couch taking a nap
I can't wait for more days like this

Sunday was brunch in the morning with a girlfriend of mine, we try to meet once a month to always keep updated and just laugh like school girls. There I was with the menu in my hands, thinking well I gave myself permission, I can eat anything on this menu I want. Drum roll....what did I get......2 eggs overeasy with a side of veggies and some bacon. I didn't feel deprived at all. It was so yummy and I picked it because that is what I wanted and I knew I would feel good after eating it.

Sunday afternoon I ended up spending the day with the man in my life and his 9 year old son. The time flew!! I didn't even realize how long it had been since I last ate anything because we were running around having a blast. Then, it happened, as I was running around with the 9 year old, his dad said I ordered a pizza for dinner should be here in 45 minutes.  Ummm, ut oh. I haven't had pizza in over 2 years. It was a forbidden food. Should I ask him to call back and order me a salad with dressing on the side by only oil and vinegar because who knows what is in the other dressings? Should I just say I am not hungry and starve? Those thoughts quickly went through my mind as if I was programmed to think like that. Then they went away, I felt an instant calm and thought just enjoy it. Have a slice of pizza, not the entire pie, but a slice. Not every day, but tonight is okay. The pizza arrived. I may have actually been drooling at the smell of it. He ordered a Hawaiian pizza (his son's favorite). There I was pizza to lips, I could hear my mom saying, don't do it. I could hear years of my own training saying are you CRAZY women it's PIZZA!  I did it, I took a bite of the pizza and smiled. I looked over to the 9 year old who said isn't it delicious with a huge smile on his face and I couldn't have agreed more. I had 2 slices of pizza and appreciated and loved every bite of it. I was stuffed for the rest of the night and slept better than I have in ages. I know the pizza didn't cause me to sleep better, but I didn't feel bad or stressed or deprived at all. I felt good, I had an amazing wonderful day that included pizza.

Shout out to my blog friend Gwen who writes The Sunny Coconut . She recently wrote a post called S Foods; it was about how everyone's body reacts different to different foods. I highly recommend checking it out, I enjoyed reading it and completely agree!!  I know I will never be able to eat a couple of chips and put the bag away, but I can eat a piece of chocolate and be satisfied. What are your trigger foods that you avoid?

Support and Love Yourself

The other night I met up with one of my best friends. She and I have known each other since we were kids. I'm pretty sure we have tried every diet, gym, and cookie together. She is currently pregnant with baby #2, yes I am very excited to start baby shopping, and she started talking to me about losing weight after she has the baby especially since she didn't lose the weight from baby #1. I told her she had a partner in me. We could meet up after work and go for walks, come up with fun healthy food ideas, and be each other's biggest weight loss cheerleaders. There was no way I was letting her leave that night feeling bad about herself or doubting her ability to take off the weight and I meant every word of it.

I've got your back and will crop your muffin top too
http://hundredsofhilariouspics.com/

I've been thinking a lot since that night...how come I can be there for everyone cheering them on and encouraging them, not letting them feel bad about themselves for one second, but when it comes to myself I constantly beat myself up and put myself down for not having the body I want right now, for not working out longer and harder, for not eating every meal perfect. What type of friend am I to myself? Not a very good one. I'm actually very hard on myself and instead of encouraging I put myself further down. The truth is, sure I would love to have more tone and muscle and be able to wear a bikini, but I'm also not so bad the way I am now, there is a lot I do like about myself. Even more important, I never give up. I constantly pick myself up and try harder. I think that makes me pretty badass actually.

Love yourself!

So, from now on, I'm going to be my friend. When I feel bad about something, I will remind myself I will do better next time. I will remind myself of how far I have come and all of the other really great things about me. I will talk to myself like I would talk to anyone I care about, honest and with kind words. Turns out, I like me, what the scale says doesn't change that.

Your soul hears you, so speak with love

Having a great support system really does make a huge difference in all areas of life, but without your own support and self love can you really ever become the best version of you? I don't think so.

To my online friends reading this, you have a friend in me and I am reminding you to love yourself and never give up on you.  HUGS!

My nieces don't care what size my pants are or what the scale says,
they love me for me and I love them!

Keep Moving...The FitBit Way

Once again I have slacked with my blog posts, but I am back! I think winter is leaving me a little uninspired. I am ready for summer and sunshine. The only downside to summer and sunshine is less clothing, so of course my mission to better health and weight loss is never far from my mind even in winter.

Winter is pretty, but I am ready for warm spring and summer weather

I've been maintaining for the most part, but it really is time to push forward. I recently started getting up early again to fit in a morning workout, I have to admit I missed those workouts, so I am glad to start that habit back up. I haven't been able to hit the gym as much with a busy and weird schedule, but I always try and do some sort of workout and of course I track my food intake with MyFitnessPal.

Do not listen to your sweat pants, they can not help you in the summer!

The biggest push to keep moving, even when all I want is my couch, actually is coming from around my wrist. Huh? You say.  Let me explain. A few months back my mom got a FitBit Charge and loved it!! My dad went out and picked up 3 more the next day; one for me, one for my sister, and one for himself. The family that FitBit together stays healthy together!

If you are looking for a little motivation and a fun way to track yourself, I highly recommend a FitBit. I have the Charge model, It has a neat display that will show me calories burned, steps, stairs, miles, and yes even the time. There is an option to wear it at night to track your sleep, but I was so busy thinking about sleeping that I didn't, whoops.  It has a neat app for my phone that tracks everything and I can sync it with MyFitnessPal to see how I am doing with my food intake.

FitBit Charge
It's lightweight and very comfortable to wear
Website: www.fitbit.com for details and other models

We all have different goals set, but keep each other motivated. Now instead of being lazy some Saturdays I find myself walking around with my mom and sister in the backyard. I can't even imagine what the neighbors think watching us walking, high stepping and twirling. Doing it together makes it way more fun.

Ha it's like my mom when I don't reach my FitBit goal for the day
Love you mom!

I recently upped my goal from 1600 calories burned a day to 1800 calories burned a day. Now this may seem easy, but when you have a full time desk job and a couch to go home too, it's actually more of a challenge than I thought. It really does have me moving around more. I get up from desk and walk around, I started using the printer on the other side of the building, I take the stairs and sometimes I just march in my office. Luckily my boss has a FitBit as well and knows I am not losing my mind, he even joins me some days.

FitBit Charge showing my calorie burn from yesterday.
Way better now that I remind myself to move more!

I see a shopping spree in the next few months for some cute summer clothes, because mine from last year are going to be too big on me this year!! Thank you FitBit for keeping me motivated and moving and thank you to my mom, dad and sister for their constant support and encouragement.  I love you guys!

Family = Best support team!
 I also want to be a good role model for my nieces

**I am not affiliated with the FitBit company in any way. 

I just love the product and wanted to share! **

Holiday Weight Loss Determination

I know it's been a while since my last post, I'm sorry about that, the month flew and I got swept along with it. Unfortunately, that meant I didn't workout as much and some days I slacked in watching what I ate. The end result....no weight loss and hardly any inches lost. On the positive side, seeing the numbers not change has snapped me back into gear. With the holidays approaching I know it can be a scary time for those of us trying to get in shape and be healthy; parties, food, drinking, and crazy schedules.

True, so true!
http://www.shoestoshiraz.com/2014/11/fitness-and-me-through-ecards.html

I am not afraid this time around, I am determined! I will not let the winter blues sideline me, the parties are meant to be social and have fun not to eat all the food. Most important, my workouts!! I have my amazing trainer Mark, who keeps me constantly challenging myself and trying harder. The entire staff at the gym I go to is really fun to be around, I look forward to going and seeing every one. Tomorrow Mark and I are meeting to go over a plan and my goals for the next 6 months. I'm looking forward to it. I may have slacked last month, but this is a brand new month and the best present I can give myself, is taking care of me and not losing sight of that!!

You can't change the past, but you can use the knowledge you gained and grow from it!

How are you planning on staying healthy this holiday season?

Support from all Over the Globe

Life is crazy, complicated, wonderful, full of joy and lots of surprises, and so many ups and downs. Every day is a new adventure (thank you Debbie for that line). What matters most is how you get through those times, the good and the bad. Some days I wake up and feel like I can conquer the world, other days not so much. But I have the most amazing support team and a lot of them I have never met before...Confused? Let me explain...

Thank you Jack Sparrow for your words of wisdom!

When I first started trying to lose weight my mom told me about this app called Myfitnesspal. It is a free site that lets me track my weight, exercise, calories and other nutritional information that I choose. It even let me customize my goals since I follow more of a low carb diet. I can use it on my computer or on my phone so no matter where I am I can keep track of my daily intake and goals. I was really enjoying the site, and then I discovered the chat boards. People write questions and talk about their experiences, many sounded similar to my feelings. I started becoming "friends" with more and more people. It was neat keeping up with their success and them with mine. 

This app is more than just counting calories
It's a community to help you succeed with your weight loss
and get healthy dreams

Not too long ago one of those not so easy days happened and I was completely frustrated, my usual support team of people I turn to were busy and I didn't even want to bother them with my frustration, so I turned to the site and posted my thoughts and struggle. I didn't expect any replies or answers, but it felt good to vent my frustrations. So imagine my surprise when within minutes I had comments from all over the globe, people who had never met me before or even talk to me on the phone sending me support and encouragement, reminding me why I started my journey for better health and not to give up. It really helped! I was able to take a step back and work through my thoughts and realized I didn't really want the chocolate bar. That was just one time, other times I have asked for suggestions on a fitness tracker, food ideas, and even workout plans. I get just as excited for their success stories and try hard to support and encourage them when they have down days too. It is this really supportive group of people, who come together and have one goal in mind...success! My kind of people! 

Nothing better than going through the
good and the bad with people who believe and never give up!

If you are looking for a good (did I mention free) app/website to track your information I recommend myfitnesspal and I highly recommend you take advantage of the community boards and make friends. These people have nothing to gain by helping you, they just really want to, and you never know who you may help with your story and experiences. 

Thank you to all my friends on myfitnesspal!

Your Pride and Weight Loss

I wasn't heavy right away but by the time I was 12 I had become the kid that offered to clean the table after dinner in an effort to eat my sister's leftover Big Mac; and Dad if you are reading this I'm sorry everyone blamed you for eating that egg roll, it was me.

Nothing better than being a kid and enjoying it

I was about 15 in the picture and
I think wearing a size 14 in jeans

It wasn't until my late teens/early twenties I knew I had to stop my bad habits. I hated being heavier than everyone else.  And so my ongoing journey to weight loss started. I tried every diet, every method, anything and everything I could think of. I would gain and lose weight on and off for years, then about about 4 years ago I lost a lot of weight by doing Nutrisystem. I was the thinnest I had ever been and loving it. I was able to keep the weight off the longest I had ever done in the past, but between not paying attention to what I was eating, some bad breakups, and food tasting good I gained it all back and then some. This bring me to a few months ago when I knew I had lose it again...but this time everything I had always done in the past wasn't working. I was afraid I wouldn't be able to lose it this time and would just keep gaining.

Me at my thinnest and feelings great

I was feeling more and more frustrated. Throughout the last few months I was able to take off a bunch of the weight I had gained, by eating non-processed foods, cutting out gluten, and really decreasing my sugar intake, but then I hit the dreaded plateau. I was stuck. Up and down, eating and doing the same things I had been doing, were no longer working. My jeans weren't feeling that loose anymore. I finally asked my sister for advice. She recently lost weight and looks absolutely amazing!!  I am so proud of her and all her hard work. There we were talking with my mom about what I was going through and I found myself getting really defensive. Even though I was the one who asked for help. I just kept saying I have been doing this most of my life, this isn't my first time! Okay, I admit sounds completely childish, but it's how I was feeling, insecure. After taking a step back my from my defensive state of mind, my sister explained to me that she knew I had always worked on myself and how weight loss has always been a struggle with me especially now with food sensitivities and obstacles. She thanked me for all my help, knowledge and support I have been giving her that helped her lose weight. She went on to say that by possibly giving me a new and fresh prospective from someone other than myself it might help give me ideas and possibly get me out of my rut. And she was right. We sat there and talked about different foods, snacks, workout ideas and how to make it work with my schedule. I guess even in dieting you can't live in the past, but have to live in the present and look forward to what lies ahead...hopefully that includes a smaller size in pants. My sister helped me gain a new perspective and feel confident that I will succeed.

I love my sister and
 I am happy she always looks out for me even when I am acting like a little sister

I'm really glad I opened up about my struggles and asked for help....I am even happier that I told my pride to be quiet long enough to hear her ideas and receive the new perspective I was in need of.  Don't be afraid to ask for an outside opinion and ideas from someone you trust and respect. You just never know what great ideas they might be able to share with you to help you succeed.