I Can If I Want

My last post "My Relationship with Food" was about my freedom from food. My plan is to stop eliminating almost all food groups and to start incorporating foods back into my eating habits that I haven't eaten in YEARS to see how my body reacts.

No more diets, just me eating healthy food choices 
and enjoying occasional treats without guilt
http://freedombeautyhappiness.com/222/

Since it has only been a few days since my mind shift and eating habits happened I know it will take longer to really see how things are progressing for me, but a lot has already changed and I wanted to update everyone.  After that blog post, I gave myself permission to eat. To live my life and enjoy. To not stress over every single food option. To not panic at the thought of eating out. To not freak out if I ate too much. To not listen to everyone else tell me what I should or should not be eating. I went to bed that night with those last thoughts. I woke up Saturday morning and the only word I could use to describe my feeling in that moment is FREEDOM. I was free; from myself, judgment, criticism, fear of failure, stress of eating, and the feeling of lacking.

For a brief moment this is exactly how I felt,
but then I remembered it's not just weight loss, but my health

I also decided that to keep myself still in check a little, I would start tracking again on myfitnesspal. So I made my goal any where between 1200-1300 calories and I added carbs back into my calculations. I had a delicious breakfast and then went off shopping. I felt giddy almost at this fresh start. Later that day at my parent's house I enjoyed some yummy food...nope I didn't everything in site but I did enjoy every piece that went into my mouth and enjoyed having energy to run around outside and play with my nieces, it was finally a nice spring day outside.

I had energy!
First time in a long time I wasn't being Aunt Cin, the lump on the couch taking a nap
I can't wait for more days like this

Sunday was brunch in the morning with a girlfriend of mine, we try to meet once a month to always keep updated and just laugh like school girls. There I was with the menu in my hands, thinking well I gave myself permission, I can eat anything on this menu I want. Drum roll....what did I get......2 eggs overeasy with a side of veggies and some bacon. I didn't feel deprived at all. It was so yummy and I picked it because that is what I wanted and I knew I would feel good after eating it.

Sunday afternoon I ended up spending the day with the man in my life and his 9 year old son. The time flew!! I didn't even realize how long it had been since I last ate anything because we were running around having a blast. Then, it happened, as I was running around with the 9 year old, his dad said I ordered a pizza for dinner should be here in 45 minutes.  Ummm, ut oh. I haven't had pizza in over 2 years. It was a forbidden food. Should I ask him to call back and order me a salad with dressing on the side by only oil and vinegar because who knows what is in the other dressings? Should I just say I am not hungry and starve? Those thoughts quickly went through my mind as if I was programmed to think like that. Then they went away, I felt an instant calm and thought just enjoy it. Have a slice of pizza, not the entire pie, but a slice. Not every day, but tonight is okay. The pizza arrived. I may have actually been drooling at the smell of it. He ordered a Hawaiian pizza (his son's favorite). There I was pizza to lips, I could hear my mom saying, don't do it. I could hear years of my own training saying are you CRAZY women it's PIZZA!  I did it, I took a bite of the pizza and smiled. I looked over to the 9 year old who said isn't it delicious with a huge smile on his face and I couldn't have agreed more. I had 2 slices of pizza and appreciated and loved every bite of it. I was stuffed for the rest of the night and slept better than I have in ages. I know the pizza didn't cause me to sleep better, but I didn't feel bad or stressed or deprived at all. I felt good, I had an amazing wonderful day that included pizza.

Shout out to my blog friend Gwen who writes The Sunny Coconut . She recently wrote a post called S Foods; it was about how everyone's body reacts different to different foods. I highly recommend checking it out, I enjoyed reading it and completely agree!!  I know I will never be able to eat a couple of chips and put the bag away, but I can eat a piece of chocolate and be satisfied. What are your trigger foods that you avoid?

Mission Accomplished..for the Week

What a week! You know those weeks where you aren't sure if you are coming or going? Yeah that was my week. It actually started last Saturday when I had my friend's bridal shower. Thanks to shopping in my mom's closet I had a cute outfit to wear and I was armed with cheese sticks in my purse, just in case there was nothing for me to eat. What, not everyone keeps cheese sticks in their purse? Haha. The party was a good time.  I can also say for the first time, I was toilet papered. Yup you read that correctly...I was nominated to be the model for a toilet paper wedding dress. It was definitely a funny moment!! As it turned out I needed my cheese sticks. There was nothing there I could eat and I was starving.  I can't wait for the wedding and  don't worry I will stash some cheese sticks in my purse for that too. Mission Bridal Shower: Accomplished!

Getting my toilet paper wedding dress

Next up..my work convention. We left early Sunday morning and thanks to a marathon and road closures I got to my first meeting 15 minutes late. My amazing and wonderful boss was totally great about it and understood, I had called him from the road to warn him. The meeting went well and then I rushed off to lunch. As I mentioned in my previous post Food Food Everywhere my coworker got me cobb salad, it was really good and thankfully filling. I meant to take a picture for this post but it didn't last long as I had to rush out to education sessions. Need a nap yet...I did! Dinner time was my favorite, we went to a restaurant in the hotel where I got to order Rib Eye steak with side veggies and shared shrimp with my coworker...recharged and feeling good for the evening events, which included our dessert reception. Cupcakes, pastries, ice cream, chocolate everywhere!! Being tired and in the room with that deliciousness was not easy, but thanks to my filling dinner and feeling good I didn't even take a taste.

Yup, it tasted as good as it looks

Dessert reception...
good thing sugar can't jump through my camera or I would be in trouble 

The next night was our big event, the Awards Banquet. As I was getting dressed I thought back to previous years, and usually by this time I felt run down, miserable, and wasn't overly thrilled with my outfit thanks to my efforts to try and cover up as much as possible. Not this year...this year I found an outfit that I absolutely loved and loved wearing it. As I got up in front of crowds and walked around to help people, I truly felt confident and was so thankful I changed my eating habits these last few months. It made that moment so much better!

Every girl should add a little sparkle sometimes
The night was so much fun, I even got up and danced a little (sorry no pics of dancing)

I knew every morning I would only have the option of muffins, bagels, and pancakes...that just wasn't going to work for me. I needed more than cheese sticks in my purse for this. So this time, I packed hard boiled eggs, salad, olive oil, and some shredded chicken to keep in my room. I used a few ice packs to keep the food from spoiling, and it worked they stayed perfect before I could get them into my hotel room fridge. Now I got to start every morning armed and ready to conquer the day and feel good about it.

Not what most people pack to eat away,
but this helped me start my day off right.
I was full until lunch and had tons of energy

The next few days were similar to this one. Run around, food all over, me being happy my pants fit and I had the energy to keep up, amazing how much a year can change. Last year I was eating anything and everything, worst part was I could barely keep up and felt awful the whole time. Not one dessert or bad food passed my lips this entire trip! Mission Work Convention: Accomplished!

Next up:  Italian Festival with my family tonight....

Food Food...Everywhere!

Coming up is my big work convention. We spend so much time preparing and getting ready. Making sure everything runs smoothly, how the Events Director pulls everything together is really amazing. It's a really wonderful event to be part of, but also really exhausting!!

Silly girls...it's not time to pack yet!

We get up early and go to bed late. We, the staff, are pretty much all over the place making sure things run smoothly and every one of our guests are happy. In addition, this year I am really excited, because I was asked to take photos for my company. The convention not only has really wonderful education sessions, speakers, and classed, but it also has amazing delicious food! We start with a big lunch that includes sandwiches, soups, and lots of pastries. That's nothing compared to the dessert reception where you will find a chocolate fountain, cupcakes, pastries, cookies, you name it!! The following night our big dinner banquet includes Caesar salad, pasta dish, entree, and of course dessert. I'm stuffed thinking about it. 

Anyone want dessert? 

With the convention dates creeping closer I was really starting to worry. What would I eat? Last year was when I started noticing I was getting sick eating high carb and sugary meals/dessert. So it's not even that I don't WANT to eat all of that, but I really CAN'T! I know if I eat any of that I will be so sick and being sick is not fun any time, but especially at a huge work event...yikes! Turns out my amazing coworker had my back. She ordered me a Cobb salad for my lunch full of everything that I can eat and enjoy. For dinner I will have a house salad with oil and vinegar, steak and shrimp, and by then I will be so stuffed I won't need dessert. I am also planning on stashing some snacks in my purse just in case. Thanks to my coworkers taking care of me I can spend more time focused on work and enjoying the convention and less time on what my next meal might me.

Saw this on Pinterest and had to agree
Being healthy is hard work and more than just weight loss

Easy Cheesy Burger Pie

There are some foods that get you right down to your soul. You eat them and they make you happy and warm inside. My mom would make this dish for us growing up that she called meatloaf. It wasn't until years later when I tried someone else's meatloaf that I realized my mom's dish was not meatloaf, but a million times better. My sister renamed the dish cheesy burger pie, after you read the rest of this post you will understand why.

When I started playing around in the kitchen I wanted to get a few dishes under my belt that I knew I could make, and make well, before really trying out different recipes. I turned to my mom who taught me how to make her delicious, low carb, mouth watering, cheesy burger pie. I could not believe how easy it was to make.

Very few ingredients, BIG time taste!

Ingredients:
3-4 lbs ground beef
** I prefer to use 80% lean ground beef (I like a little fat) **

3 eggs
Shredded mozzarella cheese
** You can use your favorite cheese if you don't like mozzarella **

Salt and pepper to taste

Yup that's all it takes. I know it doesn't sound like much and if you are someone who needs a lot of spices and kick to your meals I am sure you can adjust it to taste the way you love. Me I love the cheese and meat combination flavors and I don't need much else.

Pre-heat oven to 400 degrees.

Spray a  9 x 13 baking dish with Pam or something so the meat doesn't stick to it.  I also like to put that on top of an aluminum foiled baking sheet just in case it splatters at all the baking dish will catch it and not my oven.

Crack 3 eggs into mixing bowl.
I do this first just in case any shells get away from me

Add mozzarella cheese
When it comes to the cheese, I don't have an exact measurement.
I put in as much I want. So I will leave that to your preference. 

Time to add the meat
Mix everything together.
I use my (clean) hands to get everything good and mixed

Get ready for a delicious low carb and tasty meal

Transfer the meat mixture to the baking dish and flatten out as best you can. Put additional cheese on top of the meat and stick in the oven for about 60 minutes.

Flatten meat mixture in a 9 x 13 baking dish

Add extra yummy cheese on top

About halfway through cooking, check it and see if the cheese on top is starting to get crispy. You don't want it to burn too much, a way to avoid this is to put tinfoil over the top for the remainder of cooking.

Let the drooling begin!
One taste of my cheesy burger pie and your taste buds and heart will be hooked

I love to let it cool off a little and then dig in! You will be hooked. Good thing it is so easy to make, because I make it often.

I hope you and everyone you share this with enjoys my favorite cheesy burger pie.

mmm beef, cheese, side salad and  lot of delicious flavor!

Crockpot to the Rescue

This week has been busy! Fun, but busy. Sunday is my day to usually do the food shopping and cooking for the week. I really love being prepared and knowing the I will something to eat for every meal. I know that more "ugh why did I eat that" moments happen when I am not prepared. My usual Sunday turned into a really fun creative day. My mom and dad have been changing and redoing rooms on and off with lots of DIY (do it yourself) projects. My sister and I headed over for this weeks project of updating photos and hang frames. I admit I left the designing to them, but helped with picking out photos. Like most projects once you start it's too fun to stop and it also turned into a fun family dinner when my brother in law came over to help too.

Beginning of the DIY photo hallway

Fast forward to Monday morning. I am in the kitchen having breakfast before work when I realize I only have enough cooked food for lunch. I was also supposed to have plans to meet up with Debbie for coffee later that night. Not leaving me much time to cook. And then I heard my crockpot calling my name from the cabinet. I pulled it out with a plan. I grabbed a chuck steak from the freezer and placed it in. No need to remember to defrost the extra moisture from being frozen just makes it that much juicers as it cooks. I cut up some garlic, sprinkled some salt and pepper, and put in a couple of teaspoons of butter. I know, I know, you are saying BUTTER? That's what I said to my mom when she first told me how to make this meal, but trust me it works and it's delicious! I put the lid on and set the crockpot for 8 hours on low.

I found neat garlic tip...
After you cut off the end, put the flat end of the knife on top and push down lightly.
This helps you peel the garlic so much quicker!! 

It is as easy as it sounds
Place chuck in crockpot/garlic/butter, cook, and enjoy

I came home for lunch and let me tell you my place smelled amazing. I was drooling just thinking about my dinner.

Lunch time check in...I didn't want to open the lid and release the heat
but you can see it getting delicious and juicy

Finally home after a busy Monday and was really happy I had remembered to use my crockpot. I roasted up some broccoli and had a complete, healthy, low carb dinner meal with enough for leftovers during the week. Thank you crockpot and my mom for teaching me her meal ideas.

Finished crockpot chuck steak!

My finished low carb/paleo dinner
The meat came out so juicy and tender.
I was full after eating, good thing Debbie and I only got coffee

Diet and Dating Update #1

Well I finally gave in and decided to take a more proactive roll in my dating life. I joined an online dating site. I figured why not. I did in a few years ago and met some people, but nothing really ever stuck. When I was thinking about all the people I know who have meet their now boyfriends/fiances/husbands from online dating I was inspired to give it a shot as well.  For those of you who have never online dated, let me just say, it is not for the weak! Emails, winks, likes, interests where do you look first. Trying to weed through all the different men who contacted me, figuring out if I like what they said in their profile and if I believed them.  I started really talking to these 2 guys last week. First it was emails back and forth and then text and phone calls. The one guy I seemed to hit it off more with than the other guy so when he asked me out to dinner on a Saturday night I gladly accepted.  And then it happened...I went what should I eat!?!? In my post  Dating and Dieting Dilemmas, I talk about being nervous about what to eat and how some people are quick to criticize and judge.

Funny, this thought has actually crossed my mind

Turns out it was easier than I thought. He asked me to pick a place, so I found one in the middle for both of us and I knew they at least had good burgers. I met my date at the restaurant and at this point I was super nervous and was also excited with myself for knowing what I was eating and having a plan. We went in and talked, turns out our chemistry on the phone ended when we hung up the phone. I was disappointed it didn't work out, but I was extremely proud of myself for trying and putting myself out there. The best part of the whole evening was the hamburger I ordered with the size of veggies, it was delicious!!  I walked away feeling proud of myself for not trying to settle with the first man I went out with and having a plan of what to eat. The planning part made me feel good and know I was putting myself first.

What happened to the second guy you ask... well after talking to him a few more times I realized we didn't have much in common and he didn't like animals. Saying that to an animal lover, especially when I have that on my profile, sort of takes the air of out a possible date. Instead of meeting him for coffee on Sunday, like originally planned, I spent the day goofing around with my nieces and having the best date ever!

My fashionista niece Kaitlyn, trying on hats

My nieces love when we take silly selfies

Best dates ever are with my nieces!!  I love these girls!

Ashley had enough of our shenanigans,
 so it was just Kaitlyn and I being silly

The date didn't go as planned, but I did eat low carb and healthy, just the way I like it. I am not giving up on dating and in fact I am talking to another gentleman over email, who at least likes animals and seems to have a great sense of humor, and now I know if he asks me out to dinner I am better prepared to eat smart and just enjoy...hopefully...More to come....

Condo Grilling

My love of grilling has definitely been stifled a little by the fact that I can't have an outdoor grill in my condo complex. I am on the second floor and it's a fire hazard. So for those of you out there with similar situations, I feel your pain...until now!  My parents surprised me this weekend with an indoor electric grill by Presto. At first I was a little skeptical; I had owned a George Foreman in the past and was not impressed at all. My mom said she read reviews online about it and it came highly recommended. I didn't want to get my hopes up too much, but was really wishing this would be the answer to my grilling dreams.

Presto Indoor Grill - Goes for about $40 in the store and so worth it!
Fits perfectly for smaller kitchens like condos and apartments

So what's a girl to do with a new grill? She goes food shopping! I picked up a pack of rib eye steaks, assorted pork cuts and spare ribs, zucchini and salmon.. I decided to start with the assorted pork cuts/ribs. There were calling my name. A little salt and pepper, brushed them with olive oil and on they went. I preheated the grill to 400 degrees so when I put them on it was instant cooking and boy did it smell cook. I left them on there until they started getting that little bit of crispy look and then turned them over. The excess grease and fat dripped off nicely and was caught by the drip pan attached, helping to keep it a healthy meal.

You can see the charred crispy grill marks...drooling yet
The little hole at the bottom is catching the excess grease and fat

They looked amazing, but how did they taste?  Well, I was impressed and very stuffed because I didn't want to stop eating them. They came out a little crispy, a lot juicy, and so filling. I will definitely be making them again and really soon.

DELICIOUS!!!
I still can't believe these were made on an indoor electric grill
Thank you Presto!

Now that I told you how easy it was to make the ribs, I have to tell you the cleanup was even easier!! Once the grill cooled off a little I disconnected the electrical portion of the unit (it just pops out), ran some warm water and soap over it. No scrubbing needed. Tada all clean. Come on you can't get easier than that. Oh wait you can, if you really dislike hand washing, the entire unit is dishwasher safe.

I can't wait to try more things on there. I think next is rib eye steaks with grilled zucchini. The best part is I can make them in my own condo space and it doesn't even matter what the weather is outside. The fun has just begun!