Party, Pants, and Friendship

I got home not too long ago from my best friend Debbie's birthday party. It was so much fun. I got to ride to the party with her and hang out with her family and meet all of her friends. I met so many wonderful people who I have heard about for years, but can now put a face to the names.

The moments leading up to the party were a bit more challenging....what to wear?? I had one outfit in mind...but you know how that goes; once you try it on you decide maybe not.

This was my original outfit, but I wasn't feeling it and
the shoes weren't that comfortable

The weather can't seem to decide from one minute to the next if it is winter still or spring so that never helps, okay it will be inside that helps. The hardest part came when it was time to choose pants. Usually I would have worn jeans, but the truth is jeans just aren't that comfortable on me. Tight in some areas super loose in others. So frustrating! When I was sick last year I lost a ton of weight, now that I can eat again I managed to put some back on. Not a lot, but enough that my jeans notice the difference. So I tried on about 5 outfits with jeans and 5 outfits with leggings. Feeling completely frustrated and unsure what to wear.  I finally decided to go with leggings and be comfortable and just have a great time. I paired my leggings with some cute heals to lick the outfit up a notch and ended up receiving so many compliments!  Wardrobe crisis no more!

Tada!  This is what I wore to the party and I am so glad I did!
I felt totally comfortable and was able to have more fun because of that

The hardest part about parties for me, is usually before I get there wondering what I will be able to eat. I didn't have to worry about that this time, Debbie told me a few weeks ago she ordered a carving station with roast beef for me (other guests were allowed to eat it as well, haha I share). She knew I could eat plain meat and wanted to make sure I was covered. She then proceeded to surprise me and told me she got me a cake. I said to her you got me a cake for your birthday party? She said absolutely! She wanted me to be able to have dessert and cake with everyone else and that is what you do for people you love, you make sure they have fun too. I was shocked. I actually started to cry a little. I am so lucky to have her in my life and be able to call her my best friend.

I had broccoli and roast beef.
So delicious!

I am sitting here now, still a little amazed at the trouble she went through to make sure I had a good time and food to eat. I know I have done something right to have a person like that in my life and I will never forget the love she showed me today. To some it might just seem like meat and cake, but to me, it made my heart happy and the food was good too.

Gluten free, dairy free, coconut flour cake
I still can't believe she got me a cake.
It was really fun being able to have dessert with everyone

Have a great Saturday everyone and if you have a friend like mine remember to be thankful for having them in your life and maybe even give them an extra hug when you can!

Support and Love Yourself

The other night I met up with one of my best friends. She and I have known each other since we were kids. I'm pretty sure we have tried every diet, gym, and cookie together. She is currently pregnant with baby #2, yes I am very excited to start baby shopping, and she started talking to me about losing weight after she has the baby especially since she didn't lose the weight from baby #1. I told her she had a partner in me. We could meet up after work and go for walks, come up with fun healthy food ideas, and be each other's biggest weight loss cheerleaders. There was no way I was letting her leave that night feeling bad about herself or doubting her ability to take off the weight and I meant every word of it.

I've got your back and will crop your muffin top too
http://hundredsofhilariouspics.com/

I've been thinking a lot since that night...how come I can be there for everyone cheering them on and encouraging them, not letting them feel bad about themselves for one second, but when it comes to myself I constantly beat myself up and put myself down for not having the body I want right now, for not working out longer and harder, for not eating every meal perfect. What type of friend am I to myself? Not a very good one. I'm actually very hard on myself and instead of encouraging I put myself further down. The truth is, sure I would love to have more tone and muscle and be able to wear a bikini, but I'm also not so bad the way I am now, there is a lot I do like about myself. Even more important, I never give up. I constantly pick myself up and try harder. I think that makes me pretty badass actually.

Love yourself!

So, from now on, I'm going to be my friend. When I feel bad about something, I will remind myself I will do better next time. I will remind myself of how far I have come and all of the other really great things about me. I will talk to myself like I would talk to anyone I care about, honest and with kind words. Turns out, I like me, what the scale says doesn't change that.

Your soul hears you, so speak with love

Having a great support system really does make a huge difference in all areas of life, but without your own support and self love can you really ever become the best version of you? I don't think so.

To my online friends reading this, you have a friend in me and I am reminding you to love yourself and never give up on you.  HUGS!

My nieces don't care what size my pants are or what the scale says,
they love me for me and I love them!

Fun, Food, and Travel

The last few weeks have been so much fun. I don't get to check out new places very often, but when I do I enjoy every moment of it. I will admit now that I watch what I eat it has become a bit more of a challenge, not impossible, but a challenge.

View from hotel room in Atlantic City

My first adventure was being able to meet a friend of mine in Atlantic City. I have only been to Atlantic City for work purposes, so when the opportunity came to just go and enjoy and have fun I was definitely saying count me in. I took the day off from work and headed down. I felt like a kid the entire drive down so excited.

Me, hanging out on the bay side of Atlantic City
Luckily it wasn't too chilly out and the sun was shining

My friend had been there numerous other times and was insistent that we had to eat dinner at Carmines, which according to my co-workers, had the most amazing food! We got to Carmines and I soon found out it was family style eating, which means giant portions you share. Hmmm, I felt bad. My friend was looking at chicken parm and pasta dishes and I was all hey how about steak. Luckily, he understood my food concerns and was happy to order the steak. We ordered a porterhouse steak, that came with sausage and peppers and little potatoes. When the waiter brought out dinner, I thought wow are there 10 other people joining us. The portion was HUGE!! I took one bite and was in heaven.

This photo doesn't even do the size of the portion justice!
We left with a lot of delicious leftovers

The hard part came after when he ordered dessert. I have really avoided sugar and carbs and anything not meat-like, but thought I don't get to go out like this often and really just enjoy so I went with it. He ordered us the tiramisu. I knew I would regret it tomorrow, but I dug in any way. Delicious, is not even good enough to describe what this tasted like. I had never had tiramisu before and now wish I knew about it when I didn't struggle with weight loss so much :)  Anyway, after a few classes of wine and much fun we bundled up and walked along the boardwalk a little, I was happy because I got all my Fitbit steps in.  We then called it a night and headed back to the hotel. I know I shouldn't have had dessert, but I have no regrets what a wonderful, fun evening. I did have a little headache the next day, but no regrets.

We even got to catch a very peaceful and beautiful sunset

The second adventure was heading to NYC with my family to see the Spring Spectacular show at Radio City Music Hall. We piled in my dad's car and headed in, not sure who was more excited, the grownups or my nieces. There faces when we got out of the car was priceless. Looking at all the tall buildings, lights, and people; it's good thing they love adventures just like we do. We walked around the city for a little and then headed into the show. By then I was hungry, but not willing to give into eating any of the food that they offered at the concession stands. Truthfully, if I was by myself I would have gotten something, but with my mom and sister so close I felt like a failure if I gave in. One of the few times I didn't bring my own snack and I regretted it. I later realized when I was finally home and starving and eating everything in my fridge, I should have just had a little something and then I wouldn't have been hunger crazed later...lesson learned.

Us girls having fun in the back, while the guys had fun upfront

The show was truly wonderful, it was a magical day with my family. It was even more fun that we got to do our first show together. I love visiting the City, but there is no place like home.

My nieces even found time to do my hair and nails
Love these girls!

Happy Aunt Cindy

Next adventure is in April, we are going away on vacation for a few days to the Poconos. This will also include, Passover, Easter, and 3 birthdays (hint: one of them is mine). I also plan on bringing some of my own snacks this time to be fully prepared!!

Dating, Single, and Happy

It's that time...dating update!

If you remember in my post called Dating Highs and Lows I mentioned that I had met someone through mutual friends; we hit it off and starting seeing each other. Over the next couple of months we had a lot of really fun times; and in addition, I learned a lot about him, dating, and especially me. At some point I think we both just realized our lifestyles and future plans didn't really go together. It's okay that it didn't work out between us. I still think he is a really wonderful guy who I hope to stay friends with and keep in my life. 

So back to the single world...

I always take myself on the best dates...like shopping!

Truth is, I don't mind being single. Sure I enjoy having someone in my life, but sometimes having the wrong someone in your life is worse and way more lonely. Yup I am speaking from experience. 

So very true

So what am I doing with all my free time...duh...going to the gym! I re-signed with my trainer, Mark. I am determined to make working out something that is always part of my life. I am also having a blast playing in the kitchen more, yes more food posts in the near future. I am going to try and switch up some of my food choices to see if  I can jump start my weight loss again, I will keep you updated. Plus I have been having the best time being more involved with my fire company, being creative and taking pictures again. 

I've learned it is important to be happy with yourself!
Live and enjoy

While I am perfectly happy being single, I find that my friends who are in relationships are not happy about me being single. I have a formal dinner for my fire company at the end of the month, I can count on one hand the amount of times I brought a date to this event. I don't believe in just bringing someone so I am not alone. If I bring you, it's because you mean something to me. Recently a friend of mine asked if I was going to have a date for the dinner, when I told her no, she made a very sad face, sighed, and said "don't worry someday you will meet someone and until then you have us to hang out with". I tried so hard not to laugh. I'm not worried, at all. I do believe I will meet someone for me someday and if that's not in the cards, that's okay too. I knew she was just being sweet, but she was way more upset than I was about going alone to the dinner.  Me? I am really looking forward to the dinner. I get to hang out with an amazing and fun group of people. Wear a really cute outfit. Take photos. Eat good food. How could I not be excited?!? 

I can't speak for everyone, but I know that I don't need a date to have a fun time. I promise to post some pictures after the dinner. 

For my final dating though on this post..... I believe that when you are being true to you, enjoying life, smiling, and laughing all the right people come into your world at the right time.  

I love Lady Antebellum music!!
This song made me get up and dance in my living room

More Than Weight Loss

A few months back when I starting eating healthier, working out, and reading labels, my plan was to mostly lose weight and feel less sluggish. I had no idea how many twists and turns this journey would lead me on and how much I would discover about myself along the way. 

Look inside yourself for the strength you need to keep moving forward

Now, my hard work means way more to me than just losing some weight. This journey has made me look deep within myself and wonder, what am I made? Who am I? What do I want for myself? While I don't have all the answers yet, I am way more aware of my thoughts and feelings. I realized I am a lot tougher than I even knew, both physically and mentally. 

Excuses are easy...being true to yourself takes commitment to yourself

I look back at how I have treated my body over the years and wonder why I disrespected myself so much. I ate terrible foods, didn't work out, was miserable in my own skin and never took solid action to change that. I would say I can't do it, I will never be a gym person, but I just want to eat what I want. Now I am learning to treat my mind, body and soul with respect. In some ways I feel like I am experiencing things for the first time with clear eyes. I don't want to eat the food that makes me feel sluggish inside, it might taste good, but I love myself enough to fight the urge. Now when I miss a day or two of working out I feel it and I miss it. I even decided to step out of my comfort zone to attend a conference to learn more about my job. In addition, I discovered I love to dress nicer, do my hair every day (unless it's raining), and take pride in who I am. It feels amazing!!

I love playing with different styles these days
I wore this dress to a wedding a few weekends ago

I don't let anyone else disrespect me why would I do that to myself. I'm sorry it took me so long to get here, but glad I finally have!  I'm sure I will have many more ups and downs along the way, but I believe if I stay strong and believe in myself I can achieve anything my heart desires.  

Self love is the biggest lesson I had learn and
never knew I was lacking

Fall Into Fun

Fall time...to me it means leaves changing, pumpkins, hay rides, and festivals. Usually by this time my family has already been to a handful of fun events, but this year between my nieces busy social life of birthday parties, my new dating life, and other scheduling conflicts it has been more a challenge to get us all together, but we did it!  This past Sunday, it just happened that all of us were free and we took advantage of the moment and went to a harvest festival a few towns over.

My dad, nieces, and me waiting for the hayride

Well...it definitely wasn't as big as the promotion lead us to believe but we were together. The wind was blowing, but the sun was shining. 

My sister and me on the hayride...could you tell we are sisters?

My dad and brother-in-law hanging out on the hayride

They didn't have the best pumpkins to pick from, but we wandered around the fields and my nieces enjoyed saying ewww at every squished pumpkin. Some of the bushes had prickles on them, Kaitlyn helped me pick them off after. Maybe she will grow up and be a nurse like my sister. 

I'm pretty sure she was saying ewww look at that one!

We could have waited for the tractor to come back and get us from the field, but since we are a family that is healthy together these days we decided to would walk the rest of the way. Now I felt even better about the festival, I got my workout in for the day since I overslept that morning. 

Group shot my mom took from of us walking back

Not much else was really going on at the festival, but don't worry dad and I make any place fun! Oh look a wheelbarrow....

Who needs a festival of events when they had wheelbarrows
Good thing I lost some weight!

So the festival definitely wasn't the best one ever, and will probably not be one we attend next year, but we got to spend some time together walking around and laughing. Luckily they also didn't have much tempting festival food like funnel cake, french fries, and cookies so it didn't make it hard to resist. Since we were all hungry after the wind walking we decided to head over to a local restaurant and have a good dinner with plenty of healthy and delicious options for all of us to enjoy!  

This is called a warming up in the restaurant and excited for food selfie

Time For a Regroup!

It's easy to get caught up in the daily grind of life. Work, errands, cleaning, bills, relationships, being healthy and the list goes on and on. I can often relate to how a hamster feels running in the wheel thing, especially when I am on the treadmill (ha ha). I also find it all to easy to get caught up in worrying about all the things listed above. What's going on at work, what does the future hold. Running errands from one side of the state to the other. Bills...well do I really need to elaborate on those. Cleaning...yeah because that is what I want to do in my free time. Relationships, I love spending time with my family and friends and being part of everything going on, but I also enjoy me time, and what about dating and wondering if I will ever meet my Prince Charming. Being healthy is a job in itself, writing the grocery list, making meals for the week, planning workouts. Well I think you get the hint. This is just my list, everyone's list is different and everyone's struggles are unique and important to them.

Sometimes when I feel myself spinning on that wheel of life I realize that I am missing out on fun things. I don't dance and sing to music as much because I am in my head. I may not take the time to appreciate the flowers that I walk past going to my next store. At the end of the day I know inside I am missing something. Life should include happiness and enjoyment. This is the time I like to remind myself to REGROUP. Take a step back and breathe. Most of the time I will actually say out loud "Cindy you need a regroup". Stop and smell the roses. Whatever term you want to use, remember it and when you feel yourself getting stuck on your wheel of life remind yourself what is important. I know sometimes that is easier said than done, but it really does help, and it really does help you appreciate what you have. I love waking up and  instead of instantly jumping out of bed I will look over and see my cats snuggled up. I love thinking of the smiles on my nieces faces when I see them on the weekend. Having coffee with my mom and sister. Walks with my dad. Meeting up with my best friend Debbie and laughing over anything and everything. Loving the fact that I live close to work and can go home for lunch.

Having fun with my nieces, Ashley and Kaitlyn
I workout so I can keep up with them

The way I see it is the cleaning will always be there, do a little at a time. There will always be bills to pay, try not to add to them. Remember that being healthy benefits you and everyone that loves you and makes you feel great and is definitely worth all the time and effort! Running errands helps you get everything you need to stay on track and hey you never know who you will meet or what adventures you could encounter along the way.Wondering what the future holds, doesn't actually change the outcome, but living your life does so make it a happy one.

My best friend Debbie
Always encouraging me to be healthy, workout, and smile

I truly believe that happiness should always be a priority. And in case you are wondering, on days or weeks when I am on my wheel of life I will go back and read everything I just wrote as a reminder.